Step 1: Open your eyes even though the light hurts your eyes and attempt to move your legs to stretch until you let out a scream so loud and ask why it had to be a Monday.
Step 2: Get up out of bed and put some clothes on. No one wants to see your hairy stomach or your wedgie you have in your boxer briefs or whatever type of tight underwear you're wearing. Or even if you sleep naked, unless you're Scarlett Johansson, cover up. No one wants to see it. Step 3: Go into the bathroom and turn on the light. Look at yourself in the mirror and stare. Stare at the imperfections that everyone has but feel like these flaws only belong to you. Turn your head away from the mirror to hide your shame and look at the shower. Step 4: Turn on the shower. Bring it to a close enough temperature to where you can relax for about 10-15 minutes in hot streaming water, washing away the worries that will sooner resurrect during the day. Look down at your skin, seeing the water droplets run across your arm and try not to mistake them for tears. Step 5: Turn off your warm sensation of water and steam and get into some clothes. Feel the holes in your hoodie, in your socks, and smell the shirt to see if its still clean or close enough. Realize that the clothes could be better, look better, definitely smell better. Appreciate that you have them, remember your parents struggling to clothe you and pay for millions of different things. Step 6: Eat. But then realize you don't have time to eat, you have more important things to worry about. Water will do. Step 7: Get on the bus for school. Look at all the kids faces as you pass them trying to find an open seat. Don't go to the back, you're not cool enough or loud enough. Find an empty seat in the middle and be quiet. Hope that someone doesn't sit next to you, try to be alone. Think about how your day is going to be. Think of all the people you'll see. Think about the people who won't see you, or never thought to look. Step 8: Step off the bus and start walking to the front door of your school. Remember that you don't want to be here, but you can't afford not to. Nor did you have a choice in the first place. Go and wait for school to start in your first period class. Close your eyes and let out a long sigh when you hear the bell ring. Go to class. Step 9: Go throughout your day. Try to remember the faces you saw as you were walking to your next class. Remember clearly, realize they never will. Realize as you're struggling to keep up with everything that no one wants to hear why you're struggling, they just want to see if you did it correctly. Look at the score you received on your test. 38/40. So close, that's all you'll ever be, just close enough. Remember your number for lunch to be able to eat. Remember your number for your login information. Remember your locker number, your phone number, and most importantly...your number. Remember that you're not a face or a name, you're a number. To the district, you're a number. To the government, you're a number. Realize that you are just a blur to everyone surrounding you, just background noise to fill the empty void in their head. Go home. Step 10: Lay down in bed, your homework can be finished later. Think about the things they said to you. Think about the things they thought about you that weren't true. Think about the things they did to you that you didn't deserve. Stop thinking about yourself now. Think about the things you said to them. Think about the things you've thought about them. Think about the things they didn't deserve. Remember your name, remember their faces. They aren't numbers, they're people. Realize you are going to die one day, but then think about how fun life is. Remember that everyone is going to leave sooner or later, but then appreciate their time when they are here with you. Remember that you're going to be alright. Prepare for the future and make it yours. Prepare for the uphill climb you're going to be hiking for a big chunk of your life. Prepare to be lost on your way up. Prepare to be clueless when lost. Find your way back up. Reach the top, turn around and see what you overcame. Now look ahead, your possibilities now are endless just as if you were looking at the land beyond on a mountain peak. Realize you are small, but have traveled great distances. Find your balance. Remain at the top. Go to sleep. Wake up. Remember everything.
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You know that feeling you get when you put something into the grocery cart while shopping with your mom, like a bag of Doritos or a pack of ice cream bars? But then she tells you to put it away? Yeah, that's what your teenage years feel like...times 10. For our age right now we have a unforgivably deep hatred towards authority and being controlled. These are the years you start wanting to hang out with friends late at night, driving around in an old beat up car your grandpa probably found on the side of the road, experimenting (maybe too much), and starting to think for yourself. For the most part you can do those things already if you're a good kid with some lenient parent, or maybe you're just really sneaky and don't get caught but one thing that stay the same is the strong determination in teenagers to start becoming themselves. I don't have that much family here in Washington. I live with just my mother and no direct siblings from both biological parents of mine. My mom has seen me start to take school more seriously and go out on my own to find work. Since I'm starting to become a young man my mom has thus began treating me like my own person. My mother always told me that if I keep my grades up in school then I can practically do whatever I want. Do I do whatever I want to do? Obviously not. But that's only because of one thing that cripples me and everyone else....money. Money is such a pain in the ass but its the best thing in the world at the same time. But like they say, money can't buy happiness, so there is literally nothing stopping me or you from going out and doing whatever we want to do.
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AuthorHighly intelligent ape with access to an internet connection Archives
October 2016
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